Crass and Sweet, That's The Way We Like It!
WIFEY : Can you go to the store later and get me butter and eggs for the Valentine’s Day Cookies?
HUBBY : Sure, I suppose I’d go get your eggs and butter
WIFEY : Um, there’s so "suppose" to it. I DEMAND you go to the store to get me eggs and butter
HUBBY : Oh that’s how it is? I have your "demand" right here… *pointing to his fist* (I think the middle finger slowly came up too..LOL)
WIFEY : Oooh, she’s sleeping, we could do it….. on the floor (she fell asleep on our bed)
HUBBY : Yeah, you wish we could do it on the floor.
WIFEY : Whatever, you wish you could smack my ass (I smacked my ass for visualization)
HUBBY : I thought you’re going to go take a shower…
WIFEY : I am about to
HUBBY : Good, coz you stink
WIFEY : Screw you. I just did the dishes. I just made lunch. I gave you LIFE (said in a dramatic way worthy of an Oscar Award).
HUBBY : And I’m about to take yours.
. We love hard and we laugh hard. If you don’t have a sense of humor, then you’ll be kicked out of our Funny train. 
A Little Touch Of "Pervertness"
HIM : I got you a gift but you have to wait ’till Christmas to open it
HER : You got me a gift? I thought my Cricut was my Christmas gift?
HIS : Yeah, but I don’t want you to not open anything for Christmas
HER : Does that mean I have to get you a gift to open too?
HIS : Nahh, I got my gift
HER : Ohhhhh, you can open me for Christmas
HIS : You’re such a perve.
HER : As soon as I said it, I saw the opening
He just wrapped the gift all nice and tight. He said he knows EXACTLY how he wrapped it. I can’t even touch let alone shake the box. This isn’t the first Christmas he has done this. At least this year, he can’t put it under or on the tree because Emma could easily take it and rip the wrapper apart. No torture for me everyday. From the looks of the box’s shape, it could be a bracelet or a necklace 
. I’m terrible, aren’t I?
Friday's Laugh… Or Not
ME : I was shoving french fries in my mouth non-stop (I was hungry) and the guy on the right lane was intently watching me.
HUBS : I was too, I don’t care
ME : I wonder if he was getting off watching me eat.
HUBS : *speechless*
ME : "Oh Yeaaaahhhh, look at that woman eat fries, she knows how to eat"
HUBS : *flabbergasted and speechless*
Or maybe the guy was disgusted at watching me shove fries in my mouth…. LOL.
Happy Friday and Great Weekend ahead. Hubs handed me a glass of wine. Kids have settled in. We’re about to watch "Get Smart" (Anne Hathaway, Steve Carrell and The Rock). G’night everyone…
Saturday Musings : Coz I'm Lazy
Here’s my errrr, microblog for today. In bullet style, coz I’m lazy. I could spam Twitter and Plurk and post them there but that might piss off a lot of people in my friends list.
- Hubs is playing PS2, right in front of the TV, no kids to disturb him. It’s been a looooooooooong time since he was able to do this.
- Beijing Olympics Opening Ceremony was AWESOME!
- Looking forward to watching Michael Phelps and the Gymnastics Team gather their gold medals, respectively.
- BabyE’s favorite words are ” No No No”, “Stop It”, and “Ni-Ni-Night”, among other words
- Must.Finish.Back-To-School.Shopping.Soon
- Who in Politics is not having an affair?
- Bush maybe. He was too busy “startegizing”. Hehehe
- It must suck to be John Edwards right about now. Having an affair while his wife was going through cancer (dude, WTH?), and then having to eat his words about not having an affair. Geez…
- Hmmm, what to eat for lunch?
How To Piss Off Your Mother-In-Law
The best time to piss off your Mother-In-Law is during her birthday. Wanna know how to do it?
- Listen to her son when he suggests, "oh let’s get her a Spanish card for her birthday"
- Laugh about it at the store while planning an elaborate joke.
- Sign the Spanish card with "we’re trying to save some money so we got you this Spanish card. I’m sure there’s a Happy Birthday somewhere in it"
- Stamp and send
Of course it’s all a joke. Coz then you’d send her a card in English that she of course understands. Sign the note with "We were just kidding, hehehehe". Smiley faces, optional. Wait for a few days to send the English card. Spacing the days out would make the joke funnier.
That’s exactly what Hubs and I did for his mother. Her birthday was yesterday and when we called to greet her she let us know how pissed off she was. How angry she was on the phone when she talked to her other son. "Do you know how cheap your brother is? He was trying to save himself some money so he and Dex got me a Spanish card. I didn’t understand a damn thing. I am so angry at them".
Hubs’ brother was apparently laughing so hard on the phone, Father-In-Law as well. MIL’s reaction was priceless. She was sooooooooooo angry at us. So angry he was on the verge of cussing the day we were born…LMAO. BIL was laughing too hard because he knew it was a joke. He told her it was all a joke.
She received the English card on her birthday of course, but for 4 days she was perturbed at me and her son. .
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. No wonder she didn’t call me for a week. Hehehehe
She Can Be Such A Witch…
Get it? Witch, Broom??? Oh relax . The girl loves cleaning. She adored my swiffer, until of course she broke it. It’s his brother’s job to sweep the kitchen floor and she tries to sweep too when he’s done. I told her Father he finally found the woman who would clean for him. He said he didn’t realize he had to create her first..LOL.
She’s petrified of the vacuum cleaner though. Even when it’s not on. The vacuum is stored in the laundry room which happens to be the way to the bathroom and the master’s bedroom. Whenever someone is in the bathroom, She’ll stand by the kitchen doorway trying to talk, actually yelling, because she’s so scared to step into the laundry room. The times she actually walks by the vacuum cleaner, her eyes stays put on the vacuum. Making sure it doesn’t move or something. Sometimes she’d knock herself down on the floor with the bedroom door coz she’s not looking where she’s going. Her eyes are on the vacuum cleaner the whole time.
She turned 22 months yesterday. 2 more months and she’ll be 2. She’s becoming a real Daddy’s girl. She and I just can’t go wander around anymore. She goes nuts when Daddy is out of her sight. I’m in her “bad-Mommy” list these days coz I’m always chasing her with the hair brush. Her hair is like a dust catcher and tangles so easily. I try to keep it smooth and shiny as often as I can but mostly accompanied with whines, crocodile tears and rolled eyes thrown at me for hours. If you look closer (click for bigger) in her pictures, she’s rolling her eyes at me. Again. I told you she can be such a witch .
Saturday, Fighting Off Sleepiness…
I’m sitting here, rubbing my eyes, yawning like crazy. I’m tired but History Channel is on and it’s showing a story about the history of Magic Mushroom. You learn new things everyday
If you check the RSS Feeds in my sidebar, it shrunk but there’s a new one added. Pop Music Scene is my new blog under b5media. It’s all about the World Of Pop Music. So if you listen to that music genre, c’mon admit it, stop over Pop Music Scene and say hi .
In-Laws are coming in for a 1′week visit next week from New York, just in time for C’s 10th birthday.
My children are monkeys. They’d eat bananas like their life depended on it, everyday. BabyE calls it “nana”.
I got hit in the ass tonight by a soccer ball. My husband can’t aim for shit. My ass stings 
. Good Night!
[tags]Sleep, Problogging, Pinay Blogger, Family Time, History Channel[/tags]
